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Feb. 15th, 2011

Blue Ribbon

Sad news....

Baby Kaleb Schwade passed away Monday, January 24th at only 4 years old. Recurring bouts of pneumonia, a direct result of the traumatic brain injury he sustained when he was violently shaken in May 2007 by his daycare provider at just 5 months old. My heart breaks for this family and their tragic loss. RIP precious little boy.

This is the last photo taken of him, just days before he died.

Please. Never EVER shake a baby. Shaking shatters lives.

This little boy, and his family, have paid dearly for one woman's moment of rage. They inspired me to be an advocate for child abuse, namely Shaken Baby Syndrome. Kaleb's tragic passing after he'd overcome so much is heart breaking. Instead of starting pre-school, this little boy is gone forever. A precious life, stolen away.

Jan. 14th, 2011


WOW, so much has changed!

Well, where on earth do I begin?? It's been a REALLY long time since I've posted here. Too long I suppose. I abandoned this journal for my Myspace page and now I've even abandoned that for Facebook. Perhaps I can come back to this sacred place to leave my thoughts and feelings again.

So, what has changed.

My Lexi is almost 7. SEVEN! And my little Emma is turning 4. And..... *drum roll please* My sweet little baby boy Jacob Alexander Ringelman was born December 16, 2010 at 1:41pm via c-section. He was transverse (sideways), hence the c-section. Otherwise, it had been my plan to have a VBAC (vaginal birth after cesarean). But, Mr. Jacob was a big boy (born weighing 8lbs 15.9oz at 36wks5days gestation) and VERY stuck in the wrong position. Oh well. To be honest, I'm just glad that he's here and that he is now healthy. Yes, I say now. Because my precious baby boy was born with pneumonia and spent the first 10 days of his life, including his first Christmas, in the NICU. It was heartbreaking to see him there. The first couple of days, he did ok.. But then he ruptured his right lung, working too hard to breathe, and had to have a chest tube placed and he was put on a ventilator to help him heal. For a little while, we weren't allowed to touch him much and we had to speak quietly because every time he heard our (MY) voices his heart rate would go up. My poor baby just wanted his Mommy. The first time I got to hold him, he was 6 days old. What a blissful moment. He came home the day after Christmas and we have been loving on him ever since. He is such a good little boy. Our family is complete and I feel very blessed.

Another new thing is we are getting ready to buy a new house. A beautiful 2100sq ft 4bed 2bath 2cg home. We're putting in an offer next week. I'm very excited. In any case, things are very good for us now. We couldn't be happier.

More pictures.Collapse )

Jun. 3rd, 2010

Blue Ribbon

(no subject)


May. 16th, 2009


Today is a good day..

Yup. Thats right. Its a good day. Our legal case involving Vern's accident from three years ago has FINALLY settled!!! FINALLY!!! $70,000 is what we settled for. Obviously the lawyer gets his cut and any outstanding medical bills from the treatment Vern has had to have must be paid. But we will still walk away with a substantial sum of money. Enough to completely rebuild our savings and finally stand on solid ground. Both feet planted firmly. We had also had a smaller secondary case against Winn-Dixie from about a year ago when Vern slipped and fell on a puddle of water (no wet floor sign) and hurt his back. There had been a cooler case leaking, which they knew about, but they didn't have a sign up to warn anyone. Vern wasn't the first to have fallen either. In any case, that case has ALSO settled.....for $18,000. Again, lawyer fees and any medical bill come out. But again, we still get a decent cut. So, I get to finally buy myself a car. Its already picked out (put some cash down to hold it). Its not brand spank me new, its a '99 Saturn, but its new to me and I LOVE it. Our little family has had to ride around in Vern's truck for the last year and a half (extended cab with kamakazi fold down seats in the back, not a comfy quad cab or anything) and it has been miserable. But in a few weeks when our money comes in, after all the paperwork is done, I will finally have my own car. I am so excited. And I'm really REALLY happy.

Also, my little Lexi bug has turned 5 years old. FIVE!!!! Yup. Her birthday was on Mother's Day. Thats right! My baby and I celebrated together the anniversary of her arrival into this world and the birth of my motherhood. I am so proud to be her Mommy. I can't believe she's five already.

And back to TODAY. Today was a great day. I took the girls outside and set up their Elmo water sprinkler in the front yard. They had a blast playing in the water. I also set up Lexi's new Cinderella bubble blower she got for her birthday. So when the girls weren't getting splashed by Elmo, they were catching bubbles. I love seeing them so happy and having so much fun. Well, thats all for now. Here are a few pics from today's summer fun:

Love to all!

Apr. 25th, 2009


Here I am. I am me.

That seems to be my motto lately. I am me. I am who I am.

Where do all the crazies come from??? No matter how hard I try to hide from drama, it seeks me out and tries to drag me down. This time, drama goes by the name of Cathy. With her nut case husband who is violent and verbally abusive. Oh yea. a real nice guy. Not your average jackass though. He's the kind who takes a drunken joyride with his 2yr old in the back seat at 2am plowing over mailboxes and leaving deep tire marks in our neighbors' yards because he's crazy jealous and apparently thought his wife (Cathy) was at our house to hook up with our best friend Tim...(which btw, she wasn't. Her and Tim are friends, but nothing of the sort was going on. As if I would allow it anyway. But this idiot is crazy jealous and anyone who talks to Cathy is apparently trying to fuck her..) Yea, see what I'm saying about drama here. I didn't ask for any of this crap. This girl found ME....  WTF... Do I have a sign on my back or something? Yea..it gets better too.. or should I say worse? See, I thought she was my friend. And as a good friend, I tried to help her. Here she was telling me about how this guy ripped the doors off the cabinets in the kitchen because she was on the phone with her sister and he was jealous. Kicked in their bedroom door, pissed and vomited all over the house and kicked over their flat screen t.v. all in a drunken jealous rage. I was there for her. Told her she should get away from him because he's dangerous. Then all of a sudden, she back peddles. (Now mind you, I've witnessed some of his jealous/violent behavior. Remember, tire tracks in my neighbor's yard. And I've seen him hit her once) All of a sudden its how wonderful he is. Sure he has "issues" but he's a really good guy...... WTF???? Seriously?? She wants to stay with him and "work it out". So I said, whatever. I think thats a bad idea but its her choice right. She's all about asking me what I think. Wanting my advice. And well, I'm just being me. Honest. Sometimes brutally honest. Open about my thoughts and feelings. And when she spouts off, yet again, about how wonderful he is I tell her what I think. Its crap. He can't be the jealous crazy violent nut that we all know him to be and be this mellow wonderful man she's claiming he is now. And what does she do?? Attack me. Calls me a rude, hurtful bitch. After I've done nothing but try to be a friend to her. despite all the drama she'd brought with her. Well hey. You think I'm such a bad person? Fine. Leave me alone then... Heh...not that lucky am I? Nope. She comes crawling back. Her actions hurt me. Really hurt me deeply. I told her I wasn't so sure I wanted to be her friend anymore, after all the drama she's caused and the fact that now she'd done something so hurtful. She SWORE she should have known me better, that she was completely sorry and that she would never misjudge me again. I said ok. That things weren't going to be the same. And if she EVER did that to me again, no apology would fix things. Yup....fast forward three weeks to this past week... Idiot husband goes off the deep end, AGAIN, jealous over Tim. (Keep in mind right now that Cathy claims that Tim is like a brother to her. They share the experience of losing a child at 6 months gestation. She doesn't know what she would do without him as a friend. So she says.) He forbids her to ever see or speak to Tim again. And instead of standing up for herself, or for Tim.... She AGREES! And cuts communication with Tim without so much as a proper explaination or anything. Just that Dustin the ass forbids it and she is doing what he tells her. Well... that's wrong. Tim was very hurt by the way she betrayed him. Well damn it, you just don't hurt my close friends or family members (Tim is as close a friend as it gets. Uncle Timmay to my children. Emma's technical Godfather. He basically IS family) and expect me to not have something to say about it. I told her it was wrong. She goes on about how she's not going to be anyone's doormat anymore. HAHAHA! Yea right. I told her that was crap because she was still being Dustin's doormat. That she would go as far as to hurt other people just because he told her to. Do things she wasn't happy about just because he bullied her into it. And what do ya know??? She attacks me... AGAIN... Because I said what I thought and stood up for Tim where she wouldn't. Well. The friendship is over. I hope I never see or hear from her again. Her drama is not worth putting up with. New friends are always welcome. But damn it, I don't NEED one that bad.

So, in the end. Moral of the story. I am who I am. I am honest. I say what I think. Don't like how I do things? Tough. I do things my own way and I will never compromise my integrity for anyone. I don't let anyone push me around. It is a lot easier to hurt me than you think and when I hurt, I hurt deeply and forever. Either accept me for who I am. A caring person who is honest and feels openly. Or leave me alone.

I'm hoping to get back to writing here. I think I need an outlet for my stress. For my sanity.

Sep. 26th, 2008

My Lovely Lexi

Damn.. I neglect this thing very badly don't I?

Well, I thought that I should come back here and say a few things. Post a few pictures.

My beautiful Lexi...

I can't believe how fast she's growing. She'll be 5 next May. And she started PreK this year. She is so amazing. And such a good little student. She also started dance classes last year. Her first recital back in June went fantastically. I am so proud of her. This year she asked to do more, and so she has added Jazz and Acro this year to the Ballet and Tap from last year.

And my little Emma..

My little sweetheart. I call her my huggy-kissy baby. She gives the sweetest hugs and kisses all the time. I can't believe she's almost 19 months already. She'll be 2 next March. My little baby girl! She's getting so big and talks like crazy. And oh my goodness does she LOVE Elmo and Seseme Street.

As a family, we are doing great. Vern and I are very happy together. I mean, sure we have our issues like everyone else. But we learned a long time ago that having one another in our lives and being together as a family is vastly more important than any petty fight we may have. Vern still deals daily with his injuries from that accident nearly three years ago. And we are still involved in our lawsuit against the woman (and her insurance company) that hit him. Finacially, we are still in the garbage can. We're probably going to lose our house before all is said and done. But at least we have eachother, right. Vern went to school to be a PC tech and once he takes his final tests, he hopes to start his new career very soon. Which will MOST DEFINITELY pull us OUT of the proverbial garbage can of financial woes. YAY Vern! Otherwise, everything is just as it was before. =)
So here are a bunch more pictures of the girls (as I'm sure your judt dying to see). That is if anyone is even reading this in the first place. LOL..

Nov. 29th, 2007


A meme I pirated from Merry.

Nov. 20th, 2007


Another Child I'd Like To Introduce You Too.....


Meet Baby Bella and Her Mommy Ashley.....
Before:     Baby Bella. On September 15th, she was brutally raped and beated at just 3 months old by her own father. HER OWN FATHER! She had approx. 13 fractures including two skull fractures and five rib fractures. She has since recovered enough to leave the hospital and the beast who did this is in jail. But the story doesn't end there. Little Bella is being kept from her Mommy, who was at work when the attack occured, under the "failure to protect" law in her state. Bella is currently being kept in foster care. Ashley, Bellas' Mommy, is COMPLETELY innocent (and has since become a friend of mine through Myspace) and is desperate to get her baby back. She hasn't seen Bella, except through pictures, since she was hospitalized after the attack.
Please join me in praying for this little girl and her Mommy. Ashley had no idea that anything like this could ever happen to her baby girl. When she returned home from work that day and found something was wrong with Bella, she rushed her to the emergency room. There is no reason to punish them in this way. Bella needs her Mommy. They deserve to be together. If you agree, please sign this petition to reunite them.

Thanks guys. She's a beautiful little girl. Lets help send her HOME. =)

Baby Bella is HOME! On September 24, 2008, Ashley was FINALLY granted full custody of her baby girl after months of visitation. Ashleys' mother was able to take Bella home with her eventually and Ashley was allowed to live with them. But it took this long to award custody back to Bellas' mommy. The monster that did this ONLY got 5 years for his disgusting attack on his daughter. But he has given up all rights to her and can never have contact with her again. So thats something.



Back From The Far Recesses of My Mind (Its ok, they know me there)

Yea. I know. I barely exist here. Sorry about that. Things have been kinda rough here. Vern can't find work no matter what he does. I can't work for various reasons including some mental health issues I won't get into. Money has run out. No one is able (or willing) to help us much anymore. So we're on the verge of losing our house. We're two months behind on our morgage. Plus late charges. Our electric and water have nearly been turned off a couple of times now (and I mean saved by mere hours). Yea. Not so good. I've kinda been using my Myspace and keeping to myself otherwise. So I'm sorry about that. 

On a lighter note. Today is my 3rd wedding anniversary. Can you believe its been that long already. At least we're still happy and going strong even if everything else is falling down around us. =)

And now, some new pictures for you all to oggle at. Enjoy!

Aug. 28th, 2007

Brain of Gibberish

Hola All!

Hey everybody. Sorry its been so long since the last time I posted. I've been a bit preoccupied and busy and all that. Just wanted to let you guys know that I'm still here and alive and the sort.

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